8 thoughts on “The Economics of Sex

  1. I think it’s a little narrow-minded to say that sex is what women have to offer in a relationship, don’t you think?

    If anything in this sounds really disempowering for women, that’s it.

    I will give you that contraception has definitely made it easier to get laid on the first date regularly.

    A relationship based on the scarcity of sex sounds pretty sad to me. I would have thought it should be much more heavily based on the natural chemistry and personal growth shared between two people. But that’s just me, I guess.

    1. As a woman, I winced at your “I will give you that contraception has definitely made it easier to get laid on the first date regularly.” I always sincerely hope that people know each other for longer than three hours before jumping in bed together. There’s so little to offer in bed if you don’t know someone personally, especially as a woman. Women connect emotionally during sex. If you’re practically a stranger, sex loses so much potential, so much power.

      Giving a part of yourself to someone who is never going to be your wife is nothing short of a waste of time. My dad had a lot of ex-girlfriends. He wishes every day to forget them and the clinging bonds that he formed with them by giving of himself that which belongs only to his wife. He tells me all the time that those women were a waste of time and that my mom is the only woman he wishes he had given himself to. Isn’t that the bond you should be “sad” not to have? Isn’t that the relationship that DESERVES the “scarcity of sex” you sacrificed before this beautiful wife came into your life (so you can have the FULLness of sex)? This waiting is so much more worth it, believe me, than any sexual relationship you could possibly have before marriage.

      After all, as you argue, doesn’t a girl have so much more to offer than her sex? Can you not wait for the sex until you experience all the other beautiful, intricate parts of her? Do so, and your love will never fail.

      1. A couple of points.

        1. Don’t you think you are giving sex too much importance? Logically, if you actually think that women have much more important things to offer than sex should not be the end-all-be all. Besides, how can you make a judgement that even knowing someone only a few hours wouldn’t be good sex? I’m not saying it’s a great idea due to the risks involved, but I’m sure that there are plenty of people that can connect with other humans at different rates. Unless you have been there, maybe you will never know.

        2. I feel bad that your dad seems so guilt ridden and doesn’t look at the big picture and be grateful that all the mistakes helped him learn about himself. He probably wouldn’t be the person that led to meeting his future wife if he didn’t have those previous experiences. Life is not cut an dry, and sometimes it takes those experiences to give you perspective on what you find to be important to you. Life is messy, and that’s what makes it great. I don’t look at past relationships as giving a piece of myself away, because right now I am a different person. I would not trade in a second of any part of my life, because with all the suffering I feel I have grown as a person exponentially.

        3. Finally, I am not saying that you should go have sex with random strangers. I AM saying though that it may hinder you ability to become genuinely close to another human if you go into a relationship with rules at the start. For instance, I dated a girl once who said up front that sex was not going to happen for a long time, and that she wanted to be friends first. I truly gave this relationship my effort and believe it or not (even though I am a guy:-) I was completely fine with this. I liked her honesty and actually would have loved to know her on those terms. But then after being around her I realized that that discussion at the beginning was only the tip of the iceberg. She was so closed off in so many ways that by the end I wasn’t even interested in an intimate relationship. Even though we broke up I am still though trying to be her friend and see if she will open up. I would have loved to know all the “beautiful, intricate parts” as you so poetically put. But that never happened. In the end I have found that with people I have ended up loving, I didn’t need rules upfront. You both need to go in open hearted and be ok with being hurt. That’s the only way it will work. Because relationships are not by the book. They are the catch-22 of the human condition, and why these arguments can go on forever:-)

        Good luck!

  2. This is the best explanation for the long term change in the sex/marriage arena that I’ve seen. It is quite sad, but it all seems true.

  3. This video is good in many ways, but misses several crucial points. The Austin Institute seems to take a traditional view of the modern American woman’s motivation for sex—she wants love, commitment, relationship security, etc. But that doesn’t explain why I and many of my friends can only seem to find girls that just want to fornicate with no strings attached.

    “How much does sex cost for men? It might cost them nothing but a few drinks and compliments.”

    Or less. Try way less. Ask a seasoned pickup artist (of which I am not) about buying a girl drinks. He’ll tell you that’s a good way *not* to get sex (girls think it’s weak). The modern American woman is more apt to have sex with a man who spends less on her, not more.

    They say the price of sex is not entirely up to women (2:38), but then go on to prove that it is. “When supplies are high, prices drop”. Why are supplies high? Because the modern American woman fornicates. A lot.

    Why did the pill “profoundly lower the cost of sex”? Because women decided to take it, and then fornicate regularly. “The pill threw the mating market into disarray” because women decided to take it, and then fornicate regularly.

    “There are more men looking for sex than women, and more women looking to marry than men.”

    At best, this is a gross oversimplification, and at worst, it’s completely false. Part of the reason this may be true is due to the fact that marriage in 21st century America has become a very raw deal for men. Half of all marriages end in divorce (most of which are initiated by women), and when they do the man can expect to pay vast sums in alimony and child support. Besides, the modern American woman is usually not a very pleasant person to live with. And there’s her past sexual experience to deal with—when it comes to sex, especially marital sex, men like to be like Captain Kirk and boldly go where no man has gone before. Also, those women looking to marry are often way past their peak SMV (sexual market value), which peaks at around age 20. As a general rule, every day a woman ages past this peak she becomes less attractive to men.

    “Men are not actually afraid of commitment at all”? Well, they should be.

    “The average of first marriage in the USA continues to rise”

    Why buy the milk when you can get the cow for free?

    “By nearly every measure, young men are failing to adapt to contemporary life.”

    Good for them. Contemporary life (i.e., the New World Feminist Order) is disgusting.

    “Men tend to behave as well or as poorly as the women in their lives permit.”

    Yes indeed. Wouldn’t that indicate that women are A-OK with men behaving as they now do?
    “To a great extent the level of any civilization is the level of its womanhood. When a man loves a woman, he has to become worthy of her. The higher her virtue, the more her character, the more devoted she is to truth, justice, goodness, the …more a man has to aspire to be worthy of her. The history of civilization could actually be written in terms of the level of its women.”
    —Archbishop Fulton J. Sheen

    “Economists say that collusion, women working together, would be the most rational way to elevate the market value of sex.”

    So what they’re saying is that women should stop fornicating. I agree.

    “For a woman to know what she wants in a relationship and to signal it clearly, especially if it’s different than what most men want, this is her power in the economy.
    But none of these things seem to be occurring.”

    So women are OK with the hookup culture?

    “Today, the economics of contemporary sexual relationships clearly favor men and what
    they want.”

    Wrong. The economics of contemporary sexual relationships clearly favor Alpha males and what they want. Know this, and know it well: There are more women than men participating in the hookup culture. A lot more. For more information: http://www.returnofkings.com/13133/the-sexual-hierarchy-of-usa-favors-alpha-males-more-than-ever

    This video seems like it was written by the notorious feminist Kay Hymowitz. We’d all be off reading The Misandry Bubble (http://www.singularity2050.com/2010/01/the-misandry-bubble.html), as it contains ALL the painful truths.

    1. Red Pill Catholic,

      Everything is relative, and the video’s view of sex and marriage is relative to the era before the widespread, although nascent, use of contraception. What were previously seen as primarily the same market, the sex & marriage market, due to the harsh unpleasantries of creating babies out of wedlock, illegal abortions, etc., has been disconnected. The sex-only market draws certain people, the majority of which, implied by the video, are males. Yes, there are a lot of females in this market. The sex & marriage market at the same moment draws a different set of people, some of which could be in both markets.

      I think your comments that it costs a man “way less” to get a woman to have sex, “ask a seasoned pickup artist” indicates that there is a greater cost. Isn’t that analogous to a claim by your financial planner that “it is difficult to make money in the stock market,” and I reply, “No it is easy. Ask an experienced day trader.” My point is that specializing allows one to effectively lower his costs (but not necessarily the price). In both markets, the specialist will use less resources before meeting his objective.

      Getting back to the point that the video is comparing eras, I’m certain that pick up artists existed before contraception, but how many men and women were participating in the sex only market? I’d guess far fewer.

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